Saturday, December 22, 2012

Female Dominants Should Do As I Say!

Backstory:  A guy on CollarMe keeps posting about how he's a the head of a major empire/corporation and that a Real Mistress should come along, have him take over his company and do all the work for him.  That he wants gynarchy and believes females are superior....  But is Very Rude to anyone -especially females- who keep A)  telling him he's not being at all realistic in his desires and expectations that he's been expressing and B)  asking him "Okay, you find a woman who wants that, once she takes over your job what are you going to do in return for her?".

So after seeing him -in various phrasings- tell female dominants all kinds of stupid things about how they weren't real and they basically didn't know how a real F/m relationship works, I thew this out:

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Okay, trying to attack this same problem from another angle because what the hell, sure:
OP, many of the people speaking to you here are or have been in *actual Female Led Relationships*. They have been giving you, both in this thread and in your other one, real-life experience and views about the subject. You are refusing to pay attention to it because the *realities* of FLRs do not fit your *fantasy* of FLRs.

So you know where I'm coming from in responding to you on both this and the other thread, what my blog below is linked about:

I am a dominant female. I have 18 years of being in charge of my closest relationships. Sometimes with those who were subs, sometimes those who were slaves. My husband is my slave.

Ultimately I have final say in anything I want in our relationships: how he looks (hair style/length, clothing choices), his health (that he takes him medicines regularly, what he eats and drinks when and how he exercises), his social life, his work life (he is retiring this year because I told him I wanted him to), his finances (I control the main accounts where all our income goes, paying the bills, and giving him an allowance each month), when and hows of sex, how he spends his free time around the house, etc. He serves me - bathes me when I want him to, shaves my legs, cooks and cleans for me, gives me daily massages, helps me with work and projects when I want, promotes my work, buys me tons of presents, goes out of his way for me as a normal and regular behavior.

What do I do? Control and handle all those things... our money, where we live, where things go in our house, when he or I are to go to a doctor about something; I'm currently working all the details on a major move we're making in the spring; support him in continuing his education and to make opportunities for him in that area; and just generally being in charge of any new situation that comes up for us or making any decision that needs made.

So, yeah, I know what of I speak and the above description is a good example of *one type* of FLR. There are many types.

With that background out there as to where I'm coming from in experience and relationship preferences:

You are totally wrapped in your fantasy and would not at all be able to handle gynarchy as a world structure or even a one-on-one FLR with a dominant woman, IMO. Why? Because dominant women here on CollarMe have been talking to you about *real-life* Female Led Relationships and the views and experiences of those females who run them... and you've not been at all respectful, not at all acknowledging them as superiors (by virtue of vagina or by their real-world knowledge), and have instead actually shown a great deal of disrespect and outright misogyny.

In the last post and this one, you reject female superiority and female's with FLR knowledge because they show again and again the being a dominant woman means they will not be catering to your fantasies, won't take your responsibilities off your shoulders.

Being a slave *usually means more work*. You obey. You make your mistress's life more enjoyable, more comfortable, easier, with less work if she wants to work less, with more joy, with more amusement.

How these things come together in any one relationship vary greatly.

It may mean she works 12hrs a day and you stay home and keep house... which may include anything like housework, raising kids, running the finances (yes, as in, you could be the one to keep the budget, pay the bills, let her know how much money you can both spend this month, etc), etc.

It may mean YOU work 12 hrs a day and she stays home and keeps house. Or she stays home and you work 12hr days PLUS keep house.

It may mean you BOTH work regular hours, share the housework, share the household money, etc.

And lots of other combinations. The only recurring theme: Whether you work or not, whether she works or not, whether she runs the finances or you do, whether you own a cat or not, etc all comes down to what she wants.

Repeating a point I tried to make to you in the other thread, as did others: A mistress may very well feel that the best way to use you as a slave would be to make you keep your job as head of company and hand her the money to kick back and do as she pleases.

And that's how gynarchy would be: Women in charge of the government and their relationships *may* say, "I don't want my husband/slave to work, I want to be the breadwinner"... or they *may* say, "I want my husband/slave to work, because I don't want to be the breadwinner".

See how that works in a Female Led Relationship: Females in charge means males do what they're told. Even and often especially if it doesn't sound enjoyable AT ALL.

Now, "doing as told" may mean, "Honey, come curl up with me while we watch this movie we love and have popcorn tonight!". Or, as the example has been given it may mean, "Hand me the remote, get me a drink and shut the fuck up".

But no, you're disrespect and underlying fantasty-obsession and misogyny are blocking you from seeing that FLR doesn't mean some woman is going to come along and do as you tell her to. Just like the real-life dominant women aren't going to give you what you want because you want it or do as you say here in these threads.

Oh, and submissive ones, too... you DO realize that in a gynarchy you would have to listen to female subs and slaves and do what they tell you to, too, right? Because by your commenting it seems pretty clear you don't get that. You would be BELOW, SUBORDINATE TO female slaves.

So yeah, that's a little glimpse into Female Led Relationships and some realities of what gynarchy would mean for you (as opposed to the fantasies).

Edited to add a final note regarding that other thread and this one: There may be a woman out there that would like the situation you desire of having your work handed over to her, there are all sorts of folks out there. But something that I haven't seen you address anywhere and certainly not here when others have brought up similar questions:

If a woman with this interest comes along, what do you have to offer her? What are you going to do for her? What is she going to be getting out of you and your relationship with her if she agrees and does this? Because you've given no answer as to how you plan on compensating this woman for her time and WORKING A JOB FOR YOU.

Now, I can think of lots of things a male slave can have to offer a female dominant who likes to be the breadwinner in the household. but what do *you* offer?

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